What is the difference between the friend who gets back on his feet after his company goes bankrupt and the friend who can’t get his life back on track after a divorce? What distinguishes the neighbor who greets you with a smile despite his challenges from the colleague who always completely freaks out under pressure? It’s resilience. Our heart beats for this great and relevant topic: resilience.The question is: How does one become resilient? Is a person’s resilience innate or can it be trained? The answer is: both are true. There are a few personality traits that are innate and also some that are given to us through our upbringing. What is very important, however, is that aspects of resilience can still be trained.
If I want to become more resilient, it is very helpful to know individual resilience factors and to find out: Where am I right now in terms of resilience and what can I specifically work on? In this way, we can improve our resilience skills step by step over the long term.
But what are the 10 resilience factors?
The persolog® Resilience Model distinguishes 10 resilience factors, about which we provide an overview here:
1. Acceptance – accepting the past and the unchangeable.
Many people do not find it easy to accept situations they are confronted with, but it is important to understand that some things are unchangeable and cannot be influenced by us. Be it the behavior of our fellow human beings or events in the past. Acceptance means accepting that which cannot be changed, even if it is difficult. Because in this way we can better let go of the past and go into the future without a “heavy backpack”.
2. Responsibility – taking life into my own hands
Am I aware that I alone bear responsibility for my actions? Resilient people feel responsible for their own thoughts and actions. There are things that we simply cannot influence. Whether tomorrow will be a beautiful day with lots of sunshine or whether it will rain cats and dogs is beyond our control. However, what is left to us alone is how we ultimately react to the situation that has arrived. It is up to us whether we take an umbrella with us or whether we have to walk through the cold rain. If we take responsibility for our actions, then we can succeed in getting out of the victim role and perceive our scope of action. In this way, we can actively influence our lives.
3. Self-efficacy expectation – the belief in our own competence.
Self-efficacy expectation means believing in ourselves and our own abilities and being convinced that we can overcome problems or challenges in our lives with our competencies. “How can I do this?” must become “I can do this!”. It is important that we are also convinced of what we are doing in order to actually tackle challenges and not passively live through them.
4 Positive emotions – consciously influencing our own emotions
Positive emotions release undreamt-of forces in us and can make us want to “pull out trees”. We then simply feel really good! Negative emotions, on the other hand, can suddenly overshadow everything positive and good. Resilient people manage not to let negative emotions pull them down permanently and to allow positive emotions even in difficult situations.
5. Impulse control – questioning first impulses instead of acting reflexively
There are often moments in everyday life when we just want to snap. Many people actually tend to follow their first impulse and act reflexively. However, it is important to question these impulses first so that we can consciously control our reaction to certain triggers and prevent emotional outbursts that we usually regret afterwards. In this way, we reduce tensions with our fellow human beings and can go through life more calmly.
6. Realistic optimism – A confident, optimistic expectation.
The “realistic optimism” factor is about focusing on the positive aspects of a situation without disregarding possible difficulties or problems. In this way, we can prevent unhealthy euphoria that misses the real circumstances and still look forward positively. This is a good protective factor for our mental health. After all, people with an optimistic attitude are demonstrably better off because they worry less overall than people who tend to think pessimistically.
7. Solution orientation – the conviction that a problem can basically be solved.
This is about questioning problems and exhausting all possibilities that exist to find creative solutions. Even if plan A doesn’t work, it could still go ahead with plan B or C – possibly even with plan D. Solution-oriented people set clear goals and think carefully about how to achieve them. Ideally, they also consider difficulties that could get in their way on the way to the goal. This way, they are not easily thrown off track.
8. Social support – having and using reliable relationships.
Who can I call at 4 a.m. when I need urgent help? Social relationships satisfy our basic need for attachment, protection and security. So a stable social network has a positive effect on us as human beings. If we know that we can rely on family and friends and call them in an emergency, even in the middle of the night, then we are better positioned in crises because we are not on our own. When we can share worries, fears and hardships, the burden becomes lighter.
9. Causal analysis – analyzing situations and identifying causes.
Causal analysis describes the ability to analyze difficult situations and correctly identify the reasons why they occurred. This focused analysis of a situation helps us avoid making the same mistakes over and over again and wasting energy on things that can’t be changed anyway.
10. Empathy – to put oneself emotionally into the position of other people
Can I put myself in other people’s emotional shoes? Do I understand their joy, sadness or anger? Empathic people manage to find the right words and react appropriately depending on the situation. They can better understand the actions of other people and empathize with their needs. This enables them to actively shape relationships and not only manage conflicts better, but sometimes even prevent them.
